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joi, 20 iunie 2013

No blame!


When you plant lettuce, if it does not grow well, you don't blame the lettuce. You look for reasons it is not doing well. It may need fertilizer, or more water, or less sun. You never blame the lettuce. Yet if we have problems with our friends or family, we blame the other person. But if we know how to take care of them, they will grow well, like the lettuce. Blaming has no positive effect at all, nor does trying to persuade using reason and argument. That is my experience. No blame, no reasoning, no argument, just understanding. If you understand, and you show that you understand, you can love, and the situation will change. 

~ Thich Nhat Hanh


Atunci cand pantati salata, daca nu creste bine, nu dati vina pe salata. Cautati motivele pentru care nu ii merge bine. S-ar putea sa aiba nevoie de fertilizator, sau mai multa apa, sau mai putin soare. Niciodata nu condamnati salata. Si totusi daca avem probleme cu prietenii nostrii sau cu familia, noi dam vina pe cealalta persoana. Dar daca stim cum sa avem grija de ei, ei vor creste bine, ca si salata. A condamna nu are niciun efect pozitiv, si la fel nici incercarea de a-i convinge prin discutii si cearta. Asta este experienta mea. Fara condamnari, fara discutii, fara cearta, doar intelegere. Daca intelegeti si aratati ca intelegeti, puteti iubi si situatia se va schimba.

Thich Nhat Hanh

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